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[ Short Form & Affirmations ] [ Personal Narratives ]

The Life Of An Addict’s Spouse

I have an addicted spouse. He took mushrooms and now he cant drive home in a blizzard. I don’t like to drive in these conditions. Thats ok. He needs me. It wont take long and I’m sure we’ll be safe.

He wants me to go out with him and his friends. Last time we went out they all used cocaine. It wasn’t much fun. Maybe I’ll stay home.

He wants me to be late for work,unplanned; so that he can go to the doctor, unplanned and try to get more meds because he’s sick. He cant watch the kids while he is sick. That’s ok. He needs me. I might get in a little trouble, but I’ll do some extra work and make up for it.

He didn’t get a job again this week. That’s ok I’ll just pick up some extra hours. He needs me. I make more in overtime than he would make anyway. I miss my kids.

He didn’t pay the electric bill I gave him the money to pay. That’s ok. I worked the extra hours. I have to stop being lazy and do these things myself.

He seems really sick and scared today. Maybe I should stay home with him. He needs me. I’m afraid for his life. He can’t take care if himself, not today. The other half of my heart is dying. I hate having a addicted spouse.

I left him. I left him in a dirty apartment with no food, no money and my son who refused to leave with me. I can’t breathe. What are they eating? What are they doing? I can’t change this?

You have been using what? For how long? When and why did this happen? How did you do that without me knowing? What are you going to do? I can’t go through this with you and live.

My relationship is over. Either I lose my husband to drugs or I lose him to recovery. Either way I lose. What will I do on my own permanently. How will I live without him? How will he live? What does our separate future look like? What is addiction? How and why did this happen? What made my addicted spouse like this? What exactly is recovery? How do we do that?

He went to detox, but said he left because a man was using drugs in his room. Really. Did that really happen? That’s ok. He’s not coming here. Is this ever going to end.

He came home but something is not right. I dont know what he is doing. I better find out. Oh yea he’s high. Do I just like him better high? Am I strong enough to push him away from me again? Does he have to get high because we are hard to deal with? Im grateful he’s still alive.

He wants 20 dollars to buy suboxine off the street. That’s better than using other things, but I am not contributing to this problem any more. He tried to snatch my wallet and he wont let me out of the car. I’m scared. This is not him. He figured it out on his own.

“You can’t stay here and use drugs” I don’t feel as strong as this statement but I have to say it. ” I’m leaving until you leave”. He not only used again but also took a bottle of ibuprofen 800. I can’t let him die.

911 my husband is trying to kill himself. Does he have any guns? That’s a ridiculous question. No he’s a good guy, he only wants to hurt himself. Let me correct this. He’s been trying to kill himself for years. My addicted spouse is desparate for my help and attention, but I can’t help him. He needs your help.

He’s in the hospital. He’s being mean and demanding. I’m not answering his calls. He is in rehab. No longer being mean but kind of immature. He is home and wants to be busy all the time. I can’t keep up.

He is working six days a week, going to meetings when he feels like it and helping with H & I. He is still impulsive. I’m no longer just grateful he’s alive, I’m grateful that he’s living. For the rest I’ll just pray and wait.