Want to be published? Share your story, opinion, or investigative piece on Addiction or Recovery. Just press the "Write A Story" button.

Stay Connected

© 2017 Addiction Unscripted All Rights Reserved.

  |   19
[ Short Form & Affirmations ]

No turning back

I don’t belong

Anywhere today

This flesh is binding

Much too tight

Ill-fitted for the expansile soul

It envelopes

“No turning back”

The phrase keeps echoing

In my heart

My ears

My pores

So many lasts in life

So few firsts

Why waste them?

Trample them with good intentions?

Watch them burn as we blow out the match?

I’ve done more wrong

Than I’ve ever done right

Been given chances

I never deserved

The first time I sacrificed my chastity

In exchange for a feeling

More pain than pleasure

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

The first time I smoked a joint

Seeking an escape

From my unfortunate circumstance

Just one moment’s peace

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

The first time I leaned over

My own image blurred with white powder

Straw and hope in hand

I looked at my reflection

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

The first time I swallowed sedation

Aching to find my own way out

Of this flesh that’s so constrictive

Much more hope in death than life

I thought to myself’

“No turning back”

The first time I snorted an opiate

Watching a neatly lined plate being passed

Like some blasphemous communion

I hesitated, but then

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

When a few lines were no longer adequate

To settle the hungry beast

I watched the needle being loaded

I had to strain to hear my own conscience

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

When there was nothing left

Not even one ray of hope

When I assessed all the loss

In the rearview

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

When I stood at the crossroad

Between life and death

I looked both ways

I hit my knees

Raised my hands to the sky

Clutched His hand

I thought to myself

“No turning back”

So, on these days

When I’m back at that crossroad

When I struggle against

My very own breath

I make a choice

Often, reluctantly

I think to myself

“No turning back”

Need Treatment? Your Insurance Might Even Pay For It! Call Us Now 1 (844) 763-6205 or Click Here